I realize that I was rather confusing in my last post, maybe. What I really was trying to get out was the thought I had back when R and I decided to work things out. That he is the man I want to do daily injections for, the man I want to show my goods to the RE for, the man I want children with so much that I am excited to endure fertility treatments. At one point, years ago, he was the man that I wanted to roll around naked with, and instantly have a child. But that's not exactly a possibility. Before some of the most recent events, I needed him to become more. I needed to see dedication and blinding desire for children. Before, he was the guy that I knew would bring me a glass of water because of a cl.omid hot flash, but I didn't know if he was the guy that would be everything I needed through all of it. And I wasn't sure if he had risen above "roll around naked to get a baby" status and into "side effects and mixing medications to get a baby" status.
Do our husbands magically make it to that point when we need them to? Does it take a crisis to get them to that next level? The ones that do need a crisis to step up: are they still a step behind the "prepared from the beginning" guys? Have you ever had that warm fuzzy moment when you realized DH had gone beyond "nakie time" and into "fertility treatments" worthy?
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A new chapter in life, but it seems more like an entirely new life, and I'm loving it.
About Me
- Roy
- The great wild North, Michigan, United States
- Once infertile, always infertile, even when getting pregnant is the last thing on my mind. Divorced, living with Mom, making a new life and proud of what it has become. Oh, and falling into love again just when I thought I wouldn't mind never doing that.
5 comments:
My husband has been a dream come true from the day we met! He has stepped up and said that we WILL have a baby together, what ever it takes. I couldn't have asked for better.
Wouldn't mind some pointers from anonymous here. As you know I've just started IVF #1 On Tuesday I had my first scan, received my meds with instructions for the injections and my husband left to work 5 hours away from here. Support is sadly lacking.
Can't tell you how anonymous did it, but nearly moving out and getting a divorce is what smacked R over the head with a frying pan. Hmmmm, maybe that won't work for everybody. And R does have plenty of time to slink back into his "my penis works fine, we don't need no stinking doctor" attitude. But he has at least temporarily attained "fertility treatment worthy" status. At one point in time, he was the guy I wanted to have children with, and right now he's the guy I would endure treatments to have children with. It's a big step up.
I agree that it is important for our husbands to be "worthy" of the treatments we endure. I suspect that if we didn't weren't sure that they were, the stress involved in IF would certainly make it clear for us!
I'm glad things are going better with you and R!
I too am glad things are going better with R--nothing like a crisis to put things into a different perspective.
You have definitely earned a week of drunken debauchery. Imaginary shots are lined up on the table.
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