Half the goal is just blogging weekly, which I am doing now. The other half, the part about having something worthwhile to blog about, that's a bunch of crap.
R left on Thursday. Last night was my first night alone, because I spent the weekend at my parents' house with Little H. Yesterday also happened to be the day AF and her sidekick Endo decided to attack. AF prodded Endo to flaunt it's full power and cause major back pain. My body responded the way it usually does to Endo and tried to rid itself of the evil by vomiting. My body does not understand the logic of "Endo is not in my stomach, it is mauling my abdomen from outside the organs." And Endo has not gotten the memo about "BC is supposed to stop the symptoms." Usually Endo is lazy and just causes minor back pain, but this month it has decided to kick into full throttle. I am not happy. And now I'm tired and my belly hurts from wretching all night. Hopefully it was just a one-time thing, because I really don't want another lap anytime soon. The holidays are coming, it's just not a good time for that.
The good news- throwing up made me forget that I was missing R. Usually I can't sleep and am up till 5 am every time he's gone, even for weekend drill. I'm trying desperately to be better this month and thrive while he's gone, not just survive. Tiffany and Argos will take turns sharing my bed. I feel safer and more comfortable when the other side of the bed is not empty. Although I do prefer sleeping with Tiffany over Argos, she doesn't hog the bed. And Argos usually sleeps in the laundry room, guarding the door. I like that idea. He may not actually guard anything, but knowing that anybody trying to break into my house would see a German Shepherd first thing makes me feel better. I still wish I had an unemployed friend or two to stay up here with me, but I made it through the first night OK.
R left the house after I did this weekend (we both went downstate on Wednesday), and he left me a little surprise. Everwhere I looked when I got back were little notes. Most just said "I love you," but there was also "you're perfect," "hello, beautiful," and "hugs and kisses." I was OK with him being gone till I saw those, then I realized that I miss him so much. I did so well when he left, no tears, but seeing those love notes made me break down. So much for being that "perfect military wife" that lets her hubby do his job and leave whenever he has to, showing him how strong she can be and not bawling her eyes out over minor training or field work. At least I'm still a "good military wife" not begging him to stay home or trying to prohibit him from going away. It's harder than I thought. We've been through a big deployment, I thought one little month at school would be easy.
Oh, and I got more work done on my tattoo. Not sure when I'll get pics up (because it's really awkward to hold the camera and try to take a picture of your own leg), but it's awesome. Now the vine goes from my ankle all the way to my butt. Not a smart place to tattoo, btw. The lower ass cusp is quite sensitive, especially near the dimple region. But, it had to go over my butt somewhere to continue to my back. And this sitting accomplished more than the first two combined, my whole thigh and starting on my butt. The first two were calf, then knee. I am so proud of myself for sitting through that much. I really wanted to wimp out 3/4 of the way through my thigh, but I hung in there and did everything we had stenciled. Yeah, I whined the whole fricken time, but I did it. I can't wait to get the outline finished so we can start coloring it in. I love just the outline, but Uncle Tattooist really wants to color it and won't settle for anything less than shading, so I'm all in. Fuck, it's going to hurt. But, it looks amazing, so a little pain is worth it. I'm even "modifying" my halloween costume to show it off. I'm going as a fairy and had this awesome lavender sparkly dress that I'm ripping a seam out of to show my whole leg. The dress looks better that way anyway. And I'm never going to wear it anywhere else, so it's not like I'm ruining anything. Now to sew the edges and figure out how to make wings...
Yep, nothing interesting to blog about. At least I tried.
23 October 2007
17 October 2007
Trying to keep up
I've set a new goal for my blog: actually posting once a week. Doesn't seem like a big goal, but I've never actually made a specific plan for how often I should post, so it's big to me. And having that in the back of my mind is going to keep me constantly thinking about blogging, make me more aware of my everyday life and the things that are blogworthy.
But, this is a really new goal, so I haven't come up with anything so far. Recently an "internet friend" of mine has decided to get a puppy. This has been a long time coming, for the past couple years she has been dealing with a car accident that caused injuries resulting in the removal of part of a lung. At that time, they also found lung cancer, so she's been enduring chemo. She can finally walk again, and she's feeling strong and healthy. So she's getting a puppy, from a wonderful breeder, with great lineage. I can't imagine how great she must feel if she's ready for a puppy. I am so proud of her, for making it through everything (she had several battles with pneumonia this spring, spending days to weeks in the hospital each time) and for the amazing person she has been. She is one of the strongest people I have ever "known." I know she'll never read this, but: Fiona (you know I'm talking to you), you are incredible. I know you hear it all the time, but that's because it's true. Your new little girl is the luckiest puppy in the entire world. I love you.
Other news: as of tomorrow, I'm alone for a month. R is going away for training. I don't do living alone, even with two big dogs to protect me. I guess it's good practice for if R ever gets deployed again (I write "if," but in my head I know the truth, I know the reality is "when"), but I don't want to practice being alone. I would just lock up the house and stay with my parents the whole time, but I have jury duty till the end of the month, so I have to be here. Anybody want to sleep over for a few weeks? My dogs are great cuddlers, I'll even let you pick which one to sleep with (because sharing any size bed with both is impossible). My mom is probably coming up for a while, and I have a few other friends that offered me their weekends, so I'm sure I'll be fine. And between the dogs and a couple loaded clips for the gun, I think am well protected. The dogs don't do much protecting, but they do freak out at tiny sounds, so I'll be very alert.
Birds have been attacking my house the past couple weeks. Apparently the frame around the window is the perfect ledge for standing on while they beat seeds against the side of the house to open them. Took 9 days to figure out the exact details, that's a lot of crazy dog moments.
I really hope the next few days give me something profound and thoughtful to blog about. Hell, I'd be happy with something even remotely interesting (because I'm sure nobody really cares about the birds using my house as a nutcracker). Maybe this new goal is impossible? I really need to learn to be more creative.
But, this is a really new goal, so I haven't come up with anything so far. Recently an "internet friend" of mine has decided to get a puppy. This has been a long time coming, for the past couple years she has been dealing with a car accident that caused injuries resulting in the removal of part of a lung. At that time, they also found lung cancer, so she's been enduring chemo. She can finally walk again, and she's feeling strong and healthy. So she's getting a puppy, from a wonderful breeder, with great lineage. I can't imagine how great she must feel if she's ready for a puppy. I am so proud of her, for making it through everything (she had several battles with pneumonia this spring, spending days to weeks in the hospital each time) and for the amazing person she has been. She is one of the strongest people I have ever "known." I know she'll never read this, but: Fiona (you know I'm talking to you), you are incredible. I know you hear it all the time, but that's because it's true. Your new little girl is the luckiest puppy in the entire world. I love you.
Other news: as of tomorrow, I'm alone for a month. R is going away for training. I don't do living alone, even with two big dogs to protect me. I guess it's good practice for if R ever gets deployed again (I write "if," but in my head I know the truth, I know the reality is "when"), but I don't want to practice being alone. I would just lock up the house and stay with my parents the whole time, but I have jury duty till the end of the month, so I have to be here. Anybody want to sleep over for a few weeks? My dogs are great cuddlers, I'll even let you pick which one to sleep with (because sharing any size bed with both is impossible). My mom is probably coming up for a while, and I have a few other friends that offered me their weekends, so I'm sure I'll be fine. And between the dogs and a couple loaded clips for the gun, I think am well protected. The dogs don't do much protecting, but they do freak out at tiny sounds, so I'll be very alert.
Birds have been attacking my house the past couple weeks. Apparently the frame around the window is the perfect ledge for standing on while they beat seeds against the side of the house to open them. Took 9 days to figure out the exact details, that's a lot of crazy dog moments.
I really hope the next few days give me something profound and thoughtful to blog about. Hell, I'd be happy with something even remotely interesting (because I'm sure nobody really cares about the birds using my house as a nutcracker). Maybe this new goal is impossible? I really need to learn to be more creative.
09 October 2007
Anonymous said I have to... (children mentioned)
Actually, just a couple days after my last post I did snap out of it. A friend of mine just got engaged to a soldier, less than a week before he left for 2 1/2 months of training. R and I stayed with her that weekend, her first alone in quite a while. Having somebody else to take care of was just what I needed to get back to "normal." That same weekend, my parents installed new floors (by that, I mean R did 75% of the work and my brother cut everything that needed to be cut, while my parents thankfully disappeared to watch my other brother play rugby) and I got suckered into making stovetop baked apples for dessert. And the busyness hasn't stopped ever since.
My favorite tattoo shop is being remodeled, I spent 2 days there last week (I painted boards and fetched the level), then we had Little H for the weekend. It was great. He loves spending Thursday night with my parents and me (because that's when R's parenting time starts, but R has work on Friday and Little H has school, so I pick him up and we stay with my parents for a night and I take him to school in the morning), and can't wait to get up here on Fridays. Not sure how much of it is being with R and how much is playing with Shamu next door, but excited is excited, so I'll take it. Little H went with Shamu and his parents to see the train on Saturday. Something about it being the "insipiration" for Po.lar E.xpre.ss. They got him a wooden train whistle and the photographer for the local paper took their picture. Yay, my little boy is gonna be in the paper. Shamu's mom gave him the wrong spelling of our last name (um, lady, the kid knows how to spell his name, ask him if you don't know, silly), but who cares, he's gonna be in the paper. We usually read the paper online, but I guess we'll have to buy it this week.
The new dog is still doing great, I can't imagine life without him. I don't know where his original family is or why they haven't looked for him, but it's been long enough that we've decided they can't have him back even if they do show up (unless there is a child crying and Argos obviously loves them). We still have a lot of work to do, he's a little too eager to play with cats. It doesn't help that the first cats he was really around when we got him were nursing mothers that still freak out as soon as they see him (I'm talking balls of fur trying to kill him through the sliding glass door). He thinks it's the funnest game ever and nearly breaks down the door trying to play back. It could be a long process.
I have the rough design drawn up for my new desk, which I'll be emailing to my brother down at U of M to have a real engineering student perfect. What I have is good enough to build from, but I'm building with my grandfather and he'd try to "help" me "fix" it. I don't want help or fixing, so the best quality blueprint I can get is totally worth owing somebody a small favor. How difficult can building one desk be? Well, it's going in a corner, with 3 workstations (one desktop and 2 laptops), a bookshelf on the end towards the living room, some sort of shelving above, and a cut-out area where the desktop goes for convenience. One side will be nearly 7 feet long, and the other just over 5 feet. This is going to be the biggest computer desk ever built, and it's going in my 980sqft house. A massive undertaking, with the potential to overwhelm the entire house, but R and I are so excited. The excitement will probably wane for quite a while, since I will require the array of tools in my grandfather's garage and he's leaving Dec 1 for the winter in Florida (my grandparents fit so well into the stereotype of Michigan retired folk), but once the snow is gone again and we actually get to work on it, it's gonna be great.
Still no decisions made on the TTC front. But I've been back here for 2 months and I don't want to leave, so there is progress. And we planned to wait until 2008 anyway. We should have the truck and motorcycle paid off by next summer, some cash stowed away for treatments, and all the home-improvement ideas out of my head and into the house, so I'm thinking lap sometime in the fall and whatever treatments starting by the holiday season (is that a stupid plan? monitoring and treatments and massive dinners and all that shopping all thrown together? please give me your opinions. we're taking our time starting back up, so if it's smarter to wait until spring I have no problem with that)
My favorite tattoo shop is being remodeled, I spent 2 days there last week (I painted boards and fetched the level), then we had Little H for the weekend. It was great. He loves spending Thursday night with my parents and me (because that's when R's parenting time starts, but R has work on Friday and Little H has school, so I pick him up and we stay with my parents for a night and I take him to school in the morning), and can't wait to get up here on Fridays. Not sure how much of it is being with R and how much is playing with Shamu next door, but excited is excited, so I'll take it. Little H went with Shamu and his parents to see the train on Saturday. Something about it being the "insipiration" for Po.lar E.xpre.ss. They got him a wooden train whistle and the photographer for the local paper took their picture. Yay, my little boy is gonna be in the paper. Shamu's mom gave him the wrong spelling of our last name (um, lady, the kid knows how to spell his name, ask him if you don't know, silly), but who cares, he's gonna be in the paper. We usually read the paper online, but I guess we'll have to buy it this week.
The new dog is still doing great, I can't imagine life without him. I don't know where his original family is or why they haven't looked for him, but it's been long enough that we've decided they can't have him back even if they do show up (unless there is a child crying and Argos obviously loves them). We still have a lot of work to do, he's a little too eager to play with cats. It doesn't help that the first cats he was really around when we got him were nursing mothers that still freak out as soon as they see him (I'm talking balls of fur trying to kill him through the sliding glass door). He thinks it's the funnest game ever and nearly breaks down the door trying to play back. It could be a long process.
I have the rough design drawn up for my new desk, which I'll be emailing to my brother down at U of M to have a real engineering student perfect. What I have is good enough to build from, but I'm building with my grandfather and he'd try to "help" me "fix" it. I don't want help or fixing, so the best quality blueprint I can get is totally worth owing somebody a small favor. How difficult can building one desk be? Well, it's going in a corner, with 3 workstations (one desktop and 2 laptops), a bookshelf on the end towards the living room, some sort of shelving above, and a cut-out area where the desktop goes for convenience. One side will be nearly 7 feet long, and the other just over 5 feet. This is going to be the biggest computer desk ever built, and it's going in my 980sqft house. A massive undertaking, with the potential to overwhelm the entire house, but R and I are so excited. The excitement will probably wane for quite a while, since I will require the array of tools in my grandfather's garage and he's leaving Dec 1 for the winter in Florida (my grandparents fit so well into the stereotype of Michigan retired folk), but once the snow is gone again and we actually get to work on it, it's gonna be great.
Still no decisions made on the TTC front. But I've been back here for 2 months and I don't want to leave, so there is progress. And we planned to wait until 2008 anyway. We should have the truck and motorcycle paid off by next summer, some cash stowed away for treatments, and all the home-improvement ideas out of my head and into the house, so I'm thinking lap sometime in the fall and whatever treatments starting by the holiday season (is that a stupid plan? monitoring and treatments and massive dinners and all that shopping all thrown together? please give me your opinions. we're taking our time starting back up, so if it's smarter to wait until spring I have no problem with that)
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